in my wooden box

5 hours and 20 minutes remaining and I’m outta here.

Got a difficult time to write this post actually. I have a lot of things in my mind for the past month, for the last 2 weeks, for the last three days, for the last 24 hours and even up to now at exactly 1: 28 in the afternoon. But though there are a lot of things to write I am literally lost for words.
And I remember this words that someone has said to me back in college “when there are a lot of things in mind and you don’t know how to start…then let your heart speaks.

While sitting on my chair and staring at the monitor with a blank word document right on my face I look at all the scripts I made for almost 6 months of my stay as a ‘writer’. I scanned my very first few scripts with all the remarks / revisions / violent reactions..hehe / suggestions / and love letters of the dubbers (as we used to call it) and upon seeing it I know deep inside that somehow I’m gonna miss it. I look around the office while I let that mushy love song play to serve as my background music…(yes umaarte ako at nagpapakasenti at this point, pagbigyan na…)

My decision to leave my present job in a media production company and hop in to another job in an advertising agency is not easy though most of my friends are really surprised when they learned the news and told them I’m gonna start as early as possible. Yes, I admit I’m kinda impulsive sometimes (or most of the time?) on some things but I can say that I really give my best effort to think carefully and weigh things for me. And I guess as you aged (oh my, no!) your views and opinion on some things in life, love and work and even your priorities gradually changes that in one way or another influence all the decisions that you’re going to do in your life. For all those sleepless nights I had contemplating whether I’m gonna leave or not I also asked myself this question “ Why are you gonna give up your present job for a much more nakakalokang pressure-packed job? Why do you want to subject yourself again to a job with bigger responsibilities na nakakawindang? Yes…some of you who happen to read this one might think that it’s because the offer is definitely much higher. And I don’t want to sound hypocrite if I’m going to say that…no of course not…because come on guys…(sino ba ang ayaw na malaki ang suweldo? Siguro may sira ang ulo nun…) But although it’s true it’s not the only reason I decided to leave.

I guess I’m at point in my life now that I’m seeking for growth not only in personal terms but in terms of career. Kung hindi ngayon kailan pa?
I will always be that risk taker person…I know there’s no turning back but I don’t wanna wake up one morning with full of regrets asking myself why I didn’t dare to try.
I’m not comfortable staying at my comfort zones. Sometimes we need to learn to be comfortable at situation and places where we’re not most comfortable of because when we learn to conquer our fears, do the things we never imagine we can do and being able to turn our weaknesses into strengths that’s the only that time we can say that yes…we become a whole better person. And you can finally say…I did it!
And although my decision maybe not be acceptable to some, don’t worry because you’re not going to be accountable for whatever the outcome is. It’s only me; myself and nobody else will be accountable and responsible to whatever decision I’ll make in my life.
Starting tomorrow my whole world will be totally different. Well aside from changing again my profile in facebook and friendster account. Writing scripts will be replaced with writing business letters and correspondents. The usual internet session will be replaced by attending to customers / client calls. Checking my email account vs. checking my boss account. The comfort of just sitting the whole day in the office will be replaced now by attending to some events and activities required. No more ym sessions, no more unlimited access to the internet. But rest assured I’m not gonna give up writing..period.

2 hours remaining and I’m outta here.

I looked around once again to my “former office to be” located on one of the many confusing streets here in Makati. I looked at the people whom I may never see again especially those people who have touched my life in so many ways they just don’t have any idea of. Surely, certainly I’m gonna miss them. Teena, Joeven, Krystal…yes those people who made my stay in my “former office to be” an enjoyable one.
Our front desk officer Ate Notic who have been so nice to me from the first day she saw me. Our maintenance personnel Norilyn and Kuya Ronald for being so sweet and kind. (Parang thank you speech sa isang awarding ceremony ito ah…pagbigyan at masaya..) My former boss, Ms. Rachel, all those people who have been my acquaintances and have shared little moments together even for just a short period of time thanks guys!

It’s never easy and actually you always end up hurting every time you say goodbye. But as what I learned from Mitch Albom (uy, parang close kami) there’s really no goodbye because if there’s an end there will always be new beginnings. As I will start anew for my new job that means a new beginning for me and a new role in my life to fill in as there will be new other persons to fill the position that I will leave.
I never know what’s gonna happen but I’m sure that I’ll wake up one morning with no regrets because I’m not afraid to dare to try.

1 hour and 30 minutes remaining and I’m finally outta here.

I came to the office this morning with a lot of things in my mind actually. I was caught again on the “what else is new” traffic scenario in Makati that my nerves never got used to and will never be. Added to my irritation was the jeepney drivers who didn’t mind the smoke like from hell that comes out from the exhaust pipe of their vehicles. I don’t know if it’s lack of education that they don’t have any idea that it can actually cause a lot of lung diseases. With a lot of things boggling right and left through my head, plus the fact that I wasn’t able to sleep well last night and the irritation I was feeling…Thus I failed to send back the warmth smile of the old lady that I bumped into as I was walking. I failed to appreciate the beautiful morning sunshine that touches my skin. I failed to appreciate the 5 minute or more walk i always take every morning on my way to office that serves as my only form of exercise since last year. (Oh my…poor me…poor bones…)
But then as the elevator door swung open and I saw our front desk officer smiling at me and greeted me with “Good Morning Darling” as she always used to say something stroked me.
Here is the person whom had just recently faced a storm in her life but then still appreciates the goodness in every morning, in every new day. Smiling and greeting that indeed it is such a good morning no matter how traffic it is outside, or how polluted the air is or I was late again for work…the morning is still good and will always be bringing it new chance to start anew.

I’ve decided to post this blog of mine from Friendster here in Wordpress as it made me reminisce again my college days this afternoon and made me smile and somehow gave me inspiration that no matter how heavy or bad your day is..this day too shall pass and that you’ll see tomorrow that everything is settled by just taking things things one at a time.

(This post was written by the author two years ago during her shunee days because of their thesis.)

I just came home from my practicum yesterday feeling so exhausted that I instantly lied on my bed without even giving my respect to Mama and Papa (that made me guilty though). I looked around my room that has been untouched for a couple of months now-meaning no wiping of accummulated dusts on furnitures, no organizing of clutter and other things. The photocopies and notes of the lectures that I had were scatterd on the table, on the other side there were the pile of magazines that I haven’t read along with the Sunday issue of broadsheets-my every weekend dose of current events, and scratch papers of unfinished articles. My closet If you only have the chance to see was a total mess. I mean it was not the same room as it was before.How could I even pay attention to those things when I dont even have time to attend on other urgent things like finishing the super late newsletter, completing my practicum weekly report due next week, writing a script for our documentation. My lay-out artist and friend has now this habit to tease me, calling me the most hardworking editor-in-chief in the history of Lavoxa..hehe (of course he’s just trying to make me laugh). But I got used to it, making me laugh for a moment.
Ah, I was starting to got frustrated and during this times I opt to think positive things. I remembered the column of Lucy Torres that I’ve read it was entitled “One at a time”. It’s all about doing a lot of things and carrying heavy loads of responsibility with just a little time. She said that you can’t accomplished everything you want to in just one day. We have to be patient and learn to prioritize things that are most important. Of course it’s easier said that done. It takes self-discipline and knowing how to manage your time.
But she is right. God give us 24 hours to live each day and its up to us how are going to spend each day and make the most out of it. I am thankful that i still able to write tghis one. I promise that I will take it one at a time. One morning I will wake up realizing that all the things that i have to do are all a settled and done.
That’s the time that I can finally clean my room and get it back to what it was before.

It's February... and as far as I wanna try to ignore it and just say "alright, it's February...its the love month and Valentines is just two weeks away...i don't care..."(do i sound bitter?hehe) I just simply cannot. It seems to me that aside from Christmas and New year this is one occassion that a lot of people / lovers out there specially are eagerly waiting for. In fact they are the three most commercialized occassions here in the Philippines. (Wait where do i stand here?)I just cant avoid it...no matter how I try simply because I'm so desperately (but trying to be patient)nursing my broken heart...ouch. Yes it's the love month and yes to put it simply "LOve actually is all around."

For this whole month of February I will talk and come up with different articles, issues and anything,everything about the most beatiful yet complicated feelings of all and that is LOVE... based on my own experience...without trying to sound like an expert coz I'm not.

And so this month i dedicate my blog for all those who are in love, falling in love, those who wants to fall in love, those who are willing to give second chances, those who are pretending that they are in love..hehe, even to those who think that they are falling out of love and of course to those who are broken hearted but still believe in love and happily ever after and patiently waiting and searching for that man who will give them "forever" this is for you.(I especially dedicate this to myself actually..hehe)

For my first offering...naks! I have compiled all my favorite qoutable movie lines / quotes here. Undeniably those lines are one of the reasons why those movies becomes so unforgettable and remarkable. And in one way or another makes us feel so 'kilig' and how we wish we'll also hear our special someone saying those mushy words right on our face.

Read and I hope you'll enjoy it as we walk down the memory lane
and fall in love all over again.

“A heart can be broken; but it keeps beating just the same.”
- Fried Green Tomatoes

Yes, it's very true. No matter how many times our heart has been bruised, crushed or wounded it will always, always beat for that love...hai

“To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love; but then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love; to be happy then is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy; therefore to be unhappy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.”
- Love and Death

Anu daw? suffer daw hehe..basta un n un...read it it's true.

“I love that you get cold when it is 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”
- When Harry Met Sally

Super love this one..as in...it talks about loving that person's strength much more that persons's weaknesses.

“You can't express every feeling that you have every moment that you have them.”
- When Harry Met Sally

Oh yes...hai

“Without a heart I can never really know what it would be like to love someone, or ever really understand trashy novels.”
- Wizard of Oz

Oo naman...kapag wala na tayong puso patay na tayo nun

"Every step I took since the moment I could walk was a step
toward finding you."
- Message in a Bottle

Talking about mushy and corny...hehe but it's so damn sweet.

"If you love someone, say it, say it out loud. Otherwise the moment just passes you by..."
-My Bestfriends Wedding

Love it....Ohh...but sometimes its just so hard to say it out loud...what if there's just too many complications? Talking about complications...hehe

"I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is."
-Forrest Gump

I wanna know what love is Forrest..

"Only in the mysterious equations of love can any real logic be found."
-A Beautiful Mind

1 + 1 = 2 db...hehe LOgic pala

"It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect,
as long as they are perfect for each other."
- Good Will Hunting
Very true...because nobody's perfect...hahaha!!!

"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return."
- Moulin Rouge I love this line, i love the story and the lessons about love in this movie

"Some things are not meant to last,
they just take a place in your heart
and make you smarter the next time."
-Alex and Emma

Sad but true...ouch

"The best love is the kind that awakens
the soul and makes us reach for more;
that plants a fire in our hearts
and brings peace to our minds ....
That's what you've given me
and that's what I hope to give to you forever."
-from the movie,The Notebook

I love the movie, the unconditional love that knows no boundaries..and crush ko ung bidang lalake..i just forgot his name...hehe

"If your not willing to sound stupid,
you're not worthy of falling in love."
A Lot Like Love

Oh, yeah...who among us dont look stupid because of love? I guess none.

"I guarantee that we'll have tough times
and I guarantee that at some point one
or both of us will want to get out.
But I also guarantee that
if I don't ask you to be mine,
I'll regret it for the rest of my life cause
I know in my heart
you're the only one for me."
Runaway Bride

Oh my God, I swear, the moment na narinig ko si Richard Gere with this line..it made me teary eyed talaga. Tagos talaga sa puso...And by the way...I love Julia Roberts!!

"It's a wonderful thing,
as time goes by,
to be with someone
who looks into your face,
when you've gotten old,
and still sees what you think you look like."
The Bachelor

-Naman..kahit maputi na ang buhok ang drama..


" I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy, asking him to love me."
-Notting Hill

Gosh, i'm planning to say this line na dn...and did I say I love Julia Roberts?

"I don't wanna need you, 'coz I can't have you."
Bridges of Madison County

I simply love this movie. Actually its one of my favorite movies of all time. And parang nakakarelate talga ako dito...Want to cry na...

"I would rather spend one lifetime with you -
than face all the ages of this world alone."
Lord of the Rings

"Oh my love...
But if you wanna leave, you can.
I'll remember you though,
just like I remember everyone that leaves."
Lilo & Stitch

Isn't it so sad. Yes, when someone leaves, we just can' tdo anything but to remember them...and somehow imagining, wishing and hoping that they're still there.


"She's my destiny"
-Slumdog Millionaire

Aren't you hoping that someone will consider you as his destiny?

"You are the only person that can make
my heart beat faster and slower at the same time."
The Hot Chick

Sana wag ako magka-stroke...

"but I don't see that.
It seems to me that love is everywhere.
Often it's not particularly
dignified or newsworthy,
but it's always there
- fathers and sons,
mothers and daughters,
husbands and wives,
boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends.
When the planes hit the twin towers,
as far as I know none of the phone calls
from the people on board
were messages of hate or revenge
- they were all messages of love.
And if you look for it,
I've got a sneaking suspicion that love actually is all around."
~ Love Actually

Yes, love is actually everywhere no matter how I try to avoid it..no matter how I try to just ignore it. Love is what makes people happy. It what makes me happy. After all what I've been through...still it's always always best to fall in love over and over again.

I’m back!!!!! That’s just what I can say because I can’t think of a more exciting or profound way to start this…hehe.

Wow, it’s been what almost 2 months that I wasn’t able to post anything except “what does my name means’ section on my blog. Awww.... It’s not because I’m tired or I don’t have anything to write anymore. It’s just my choice… a certain feeling that got into me. And there are reasons that I intend to share for my upcoming posts…pramis


SEGWAY
(This is a too late for the New Years post

It actually feels good that I’ve got a new blog template. (Just got this from blogger buster. com. Isn't it so fabulous?!) New look, new lay-out. I actually wanted to personalize this blog like what I used to have. A template that I can actually call as ‘mine’ my brainchild masterpiece…hehe, that would really make me proud of myself. But my gosh, I’m not really that good in using HTML aside from the fact that I started to get impatient. But I promise myself that I won’t stop until I’m done…hehe, as what my college colleague used to say.

Aside from my blog’s new look to start another year of blogging. I’ve decided to make not the "always meant to be broken New Years Resolution" but a things to-do-list for this year. I just got so inspired by Lucy Torres column in the Philippine Star last two Sundays I think. I believe that you're making your year right by having a definite goals to achieve, things to do and tasks to accomplish...trying your best to do even just a half of it if not all of them.

1. Pray more and even harder not just for myself but for others.
2.Blog as often as I can
3. Write as often as I can even without deadlines.
4. Spend more time with friends and family
5. Make my dream scrapbook finally
6. Be more health conscious..learn to drink those multivitamins and any healthy supplements that my Mama and Ate's are offering me.
7. Buy and read more books
8.Watch my favorite movies again on DVD
9.Learn to recycle those bottles of juices that I buy.
10. Have a trip to Tagaytay with my bestfriend.
11. Have a romance with crocheting and cross-stitching..again
12.Be more forgiving and understanding
13. Have at least one charitable organization to join to.
14.Be more organize in my room, with my things, and office desk most especially.
15.Learn to bake once again and finally be able to learn to bake creme brulee.
16. Learn to drive this summer season.
17. Learn to play guitar once again...this time I'll try to be more patient.
18. Have a whole body massage and foot spa at least once a month.
19. Buy more scented candles and flower decorations for our house.
20.Be sweeter, more loving girlfriend...daughter and friend.(haha!)
21.Eat more fruits and vegetables.
22.Don't forget to hug my cat and dog everytime that I leave.
23. Be more punctual.
24.Have a different birthday celebration this year.
25.Watch sunrise at least once this year.
26.Learn to manage my emails and responsibly respond to it.
27. Be more active and vigilant Greenpeace member.
28.Excercise, do stetch my lazy bones every morning.
29.Remember all my friends birthdays.
30.Plant a tree on my birthday.
31.Keep all things whether a simple bus or plane ticket, photos, whtaever memorabilia I can have for every places I'll go and include it in my travel scrapbook.
32. Open my own savings account.

I dont promise that I can actually complete and accomplish all these things that are written here. But just seeing this to do list in my blog that already inpires me to slowly and patiently start one. Having a certain purpose and goal each day is one step to become a better person and become that person who WE want to be.